Someone Is Actually Selling “Suck It” From The Office in Real Life Now

“Suck It” is no longer just David Wallace’s weird idea for a kids toy. The Office joke is now a real product you can buy.

David Wallace in The Office
Photo: NBC

Has there ever been a worse idea than David Wallace’s “Suck It” shop-vac for kids? Not according to the United States Military, who paid enough lettuce for the idea to put the disgraced Dunder Mifflin CFO back on the map. By the end of US version of The Office, Wallace was head of his old company once again and thriving. Makes you wonder what would have been had Michael Scott actually joined his former boss for “Suck It” in the season 6 episode “Sabre” and made his millions. For one thing, “Scott’s Tots” would have a much happier ending.

You can’t completely blame Michael for being so shortsighted, though. As David describes it while hanging out with Michael in the hot tub, “Suck It” sounds like a desperate unemployed man’s fever dream of a second coming.

“You know how kids leave their toys everywhere?” David explains in the episode. “This is a vacuum. It’s like a shop-vac type of thing. Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp. It teaches kids how to pick up their own toys. Baseball gloves, hacky sacks, drumsticks. Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp. Picks it up.”

There are very few things that would make Michael not want to team up with David Wallace and “Suck It” is one of them. “That’s not the David Wallace I remember,” Michael says, fleeing the scene before he’s talked into a threesome with “Arnie from Research.” Alas, we never got to see “Suck It” in the flesh before the show completed its run in 2013.


Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *